It’s not my job to try and convince anyone to get vaccinated or wear a mask or any other behavior.
It’s not my job to blast people who don’t choose to do either of those things, or even vice versa.
It’s not my job to choose for someone else.
My only job is to choose for myself.
Each choice carries a consequence. Each consequence will carry their own merits and negatives.
I have to live with my choices and the subsequent dominos falling behind them.
And sometimes those consequences are repercussive choices made by other people who are yet still beyond my control.
I am in no position, nor have any desire, to tell other people what to do. I know that I don’t like being told what to do either. That doesn’t mean I don’t have opinions about it though.
So, I chose to get vaccinated.
I choose to continue wearing a mask in public places where it’s not open air.
Do I want you to get vaccinated?
If you are able, then yes. I think it’s the safe and considerate thing to do because this illness goes far beyond you or me. I’ve seen the impact of how it ravaged my home in New York City, and I don’t want more to suffer from this illness that has left almost a quarter of a million dead and thousands of others with seemingly irreparable long-lasting effects of the heart, lungs, nerves, and more. I’ve seen it. I’ve had it. I know people who’ve had it, and those who died from it.
So, I know that a vaccine is right for me. I’ve had a hunch from the beginning that this illness is something we will have to manage for years to come. I even had a feeling about which vaccine I should get.
Do I want you to wear a mask?
Ideally, yes. Especially if you’re in a public, enclosed space, you bet your bottom dollar I do. If I see you wearing a mask and it’s below your nose, I may have the impulse to yell “Penis nose!” in your direction, but I won’t do it (put it away, no one wants to see that in public). But ultimately… That’s not my choice.
That’s your choice.
I’m not here to argue about freedom or freedoms being taken away. I can see and hear arguments on both sides of this debate, and honestly, I’m worn out with all of it. And when I’m worn out, I tend to tune out.
All I can do is make the best choice I can with the experience, the wisdom, and instinct I have available to me.
You can do this too.
Because the crux of freedom… is choice. You get to choose and that’s the beauty of it. And in choosing, there will be consequences no matter which way you turn it. Not everything will go in your favor based on your choice, and you have to let that be okay.
There’s only so much you can control. Let go of the rest.
So, which consequences will you sign up for?
Which consequences do you choose based on the choice you want to make?
Fun fact: I was out for the count for three days following my second COVID vaccine.
I made that choice. I wanted to be a person who would be a safer space for those who may not be able to get the vaccine or who may have more sensitive immune systems than myself. I was thinking about the people I’d come into contact with eventually. And I wanted to be a person who, if I got COVID, my symptoms wouldn’t be as severe—because I’m pretty sure my partner and I had it back in February 2020, if not December 2019. And that was scary enough (especially as someone who rarely gets sick).
So, I’m not here to convince you of anything. Just to share my experience.
I’m only here to remind you that you do have a choice. We all do.
And I don’t hate you for using that power of choice. You just have to be ready for whatever consequences come from it.
I know who I want to be, and I don’t want to be someone who’s telling people to “wake up”, “do your research”, “escape the matrix”, “listen to science”, and all these other things I’m hearing all the time, from every side. I don’t think that’s helpful, honestly. It’s more abrasive than I’d like to be. More power to the people who feel that desire to rattle people’s cages in such a way. That’s simply not the example I want to set nor the way I want to be. I find myself walking a strange middle ground on this… like a bridge between extremes.
It’s not my job to wake you up.
It’s not my job to make you see the light.
It’s not my job to try and convince you to get the vaccine.
It’s not my job to tell you what to do, period.
We all have our own unique authority within us.
Our own capabilities to discern what is right for us. Our bodies and our inner wisdom speak to each of us in different ways. (Thanks, Human Design, for making me aware of my own!)
My inner authority happens to be quiet and in the moment. That little nudge. It’s that little nudge that influenced me to write this a while back and to now share it today. It’s something that’s been brewing on my heart for a bit, and as I see more and more people speak up about their truths, I felt like I was doing a disservice by keeping mine in the dark.
Like I said… I’m not here to convince you of anything. If anything, my job is to remind you that you are your own individual within the greater collective.
And our choices impact the greater collective, whether you recognize that or not, but ultimately it’s up to us to choose for ourselves.
You can listen to others—family, friends, science, politicians, whomever—but have you stopped to listen to yourself? Not the shoulds or coulds from both your inner and outer worlds, but…
What is stirring you to choose a certain way from within? What feels right for you? When you’re in a calm, centered place, where does your soul prompt you to go and do?
Just remember this…
Every choice comes with a change.
You get to choose who you want to be. You build who you are by the choices you make each and every day. You can always choose differently. The power of choice is yours and yours alone. I hope you don’t forget that.
That’s something that I’m trying to do.
I love holding space for multiple perspectives so much that it can take me a while to truly discern where I stand sometimes. I’m learning to listen to my inner authority so I can figure that out for myself.
My bottom line: It’s my job to choose what’s best for me and that means choosing for my sanity and also for what I stand for.
And I stand for love, respect, and compassion for all.
No matter what you choose, I will do my utter best to approach you from a place of love and kindness. Not hate, not fear, not judgment… Okay, maybe a little judgment, I can’t make that guarantee (Penis nose!). But I can at least check that judgment enough to listen if you feel like sharing.
One of my favorite things is when people find me a safe space to open up and be themselves. I can see things from multiple perspectives. I see different possibilities.
And I can see what works for me, even if I cannot do that for anyone else.